Sometimes we imagine marriage as a place we arrive— a finish line of sorts. A symbol of certainty and security, that says “we made it.”
But the truth?
Marriage isn’t a destination. It’s a living relationship that is always unfolding.
You’re not failing because you’ve hit bumps in the road. You’re simply on the road.
Marriage moves through seasons — some light and connected, others heavier and harder to navigate. Some days you walk in step. Other days, you feel out of sync. That doesn’t mean something’s “broken.” It means you’re human. And in motion.
And yet, in the age of social media, it’s easy to forget that.
We scroll past highlight reels — filtered vacations, anniversary captions, perfectly posed smiles — and start to wonder, Are we the only ones struggling?
But behind every polished post is a real relationship, with real challenges and raw, unfiltered effort.
Why?
We don’t marry a fixed version of one another. We marry someone who is growing and evolving — just like we are.
What keeps a marriage alive isn’t perfection. It’s the willingness to return to one another again and again — with honesty, humility, and hope.
Like any journey, it helps to:
- Pause when you need rest.
Maybe that means canceling plans and staying in together when you’re both emotionally drained. Or deciding to table a hard conversation until you’ve both had a moment to breathe.
- Name when you feel lost.“I don’t know how to fix this, but I miss us.”
“I feel like we keep missing each other lately.”
These aren’t admissions of failure — they’re invitations back to connection.
- Celebrate how far you’ve come.
Look back at the small wins: the tough conversation you had without escalating or shutting down, the way you’ve learned to ask for what you need, the fact that you’re still trying. Progress isn’t loud — it’s a quiet, enduring resilience.
- Offer directions gently when the way forward feels unclear.“Can I tell you what would help me feel closer to you right now?”
“Would you be open to trying a different way to approach this?”
Less blame, more curiosity — that’s how new paths get paved.
And yes — it’s okay to ask for help along the way.
Sometimes, it helps to have someone — like me — walk beside you for a time, helping you to navigate the tough stretches with more ease and grace
At the end of the day – the glue that binds you is found in:
- The unnamed places you choose to move through instead of going around.
- The forgiveness you offer yourself, which softens you to one another.
- The everyday moments of connection you welcome even when you’re not in a “great place.”
That kind of love — the kind that chooses presence over perfection — is sacred. It’s also sticky.
And it’s far more rewarding than any picture-perfect moment.
So here’s to you — and all that you’re doing to stay afloat, stay open, and stay together on this winding road of marriage.
You’re not behind.
You’re somewhere in the middle of your story.
And you’re in good company. Reach out to me here